For some people, dating is one big adventure filled with interesting people, hilarious escapades and memorable stories. But if you’re an introvert, navigating that world feels more like a minefield of anxiety and awkwardness. And if you are looking to couple up, you can’t exactly opt out. Here are ten rules every romance-seeking introvert should follow to help them find the person that will complement them best.
- Drop a few hints about your introversion in your online dating profile.
- Set a (reasonable) quota for yourself.
- Don’t wait too long before meeting up.
- Pick a familiar venue.
- Front-load your solo time
- Do something interactive.
- Accept that you’re going to have to make some small talk
- Be wary of people who don’t respect your alone time.
- …But give people a chance.
- Don’t overthink it.
Drop a few hints about your introversion in your online dating profile.
Mention the book you’re obsessed with at the moment or that you’re all about a Friday night on the couch. There are plenty of fellow introverts (and introvert-loving extroverts) who appreciate those things just as much as you do.
Set a (reasonable) quota for yourself.
We’re firm believers of quality over quantity when it comes to dating, but if you avoid taking the plunge too often, you might suddenly realize two years have gone by, date-free. Figure out what works with your schedule and comfort level—say, once a week or once a month—and do your best to stick to it, even if you don’t always feel like it.
Don’t wait too long before meeting up.
It can be easy to keep texting that Bumble match forever—you might feel more confident when you have time to compose your thoughts—but don’t fall into the trap of using that digital wall as a crutch. If you want a relationship and not a pen pal, you’re better off making IRL plans fairly quickly.
Pick a familiar venue.
First dates are nerve-racking enough without worrying about unknown menus or whether you’ll be able to hear over a too-loud room. A place where you know you’ll be comfortable (like your favorite neighborhood coffee shop) takes those variables out of the equation so you can focus on the actual date.
Front-load your solo time.
Woo-hoo, you have a date on Thursday! That might mean turning down happy hour with your coworkers on Wednesday if you need the extra time to recharge (or in this case, pre-charge). The last thing you want is to feel burned out before you even get there.
Do something interactive.
If you’re worried about awkward lulls in the conversation (which aren’t the end of the world, for the record), opt for an activity that gives you plenty to discuss, like taking a walk through a busy neighborhood (better yet, with a dog), hitting up an art exhibit or taking a brewery tour.
Accept that you’re going to have to make some small talk.
You’d much rather launch straight into the deep, philosophical questions, but you don’t want to scare anyone. Make an effort to volley back a few of the other person’s get-to-know-you questions (like where they grew up and what they studied in college)…and then slip in something more thought-provoking (like what era they’d most like to time-travel to and why).
Be wary of people who don’t respect your alone time.
Sure, it’s flattering when someone wants to see you nonstop, but if you feel like it’s cutting into your much-needed solitude, say something. Anyone who’s not cool with it after five dates isn’t going to get it three years down the road.
…But give people a chance.
As much as you value meaningful relationships and would rather skip the trivial stuff, you unfortunately can’t always skip ahead. Trust your instincts, but keep in mind you’re not the only one who might be slow to open up. You don’t want to miss out on a good connection.
Don’t overthink it.
Odds are, the many worrisome scenarios swirling in your head are way more stress-inducing than what’s actually happening. Give yourself permission to get out of your head a little bit, even if it’s just for a few hours. There’ll be plenty of time to daydream later.
Good luck out there!
Cozy Up with These DIY Fall Drinks
Autumn is so exciting! It’s chilly, pretty, and awesome. Warm sweaters, cozy reading socks, and delicious hot autumn drinks. Nothing feels cozier than curling up with a hot cup of your favorite fall drink under a warm throw and not feeling guilty about staying inside because, well, it’s far too chilly out to be out there. So here is a list of our favorite, most delicious fall drinks. Enjoy!
Decadent Nutella Hot Chocolate *Crock Pot
- 6 1/2 cups skim milk
- 1 can sweetened condensed milk
- 1 T vanilla
- 1/4 cup cocoa
- 1 cup Nutella
- 1/4 tsp salt
Combine all ingredients in the Crock Pot and cook on low for 2 hours. For a less sweet, more milky version, add 1 to 2 cups more skim milk.
Pumpkin Spice Coffee
- Brewed Coffee
- 1 T Pumpkin pie filling
- Pumpkin pie spice to garnish
- Vanilla creamer
Mix pumpkin pie filling and a splash of vanilla creamer to taste with cup of brewed coffee. Add whipped cream and pumpkin pie spice to garnish as desired. Enjoy!
Read Next: 50 Warm and Cozy Fall Dinner Recipes
CARAMEL APPLE CIDER
- 4 cups apple cider
- 2 tsp vanilla
- 1 tsp apple pie spice
- 1/4 cup caramel
- cinnamon stick (optional)
Cook to simmer and serve!
Salted Caramel Mocha
- Mocha latte k-cup kit from Starbucks
- Sea salt
- Caramel Sauce
- Turbinado sugar (for garnish
Add a dash of sea salt and caramel sauce to Starbucks mocha latte k-cup kit. Garnish with whipped cream and turbinado sugar as desired. Enjoy!
Read next: Easy and Delicious Butternut squash Chili
3 Unusual Ways to Improve the Value of your Home
A house is one of the biggest things you’ll ever buy. It’s also one of the most significant investments in your portfolio. After all, when all else fails, you can rest assured that people will always need real-estate. However, it’s up to you to make sure that the house you purchase continues gaining value in the years to come. While there are many outside factors that can affect the value of a home, including changes in the ecosystem, and even the arrival of new amenities in your area, there are also things that you can do as a homeowner to make people want to pay more for your property. Since you’ve probably already thought about common options like replacing your kitchen or designing a new bathroom, we’re going to share some of the less conventional things you can do to transform your home.
Create a Fisherman’s Paradise
If you have a property that’s close to a body of water or even has its own riverside, then you’re going to be ahead of the curve already when it comes to gaining real-estate value. However, you can always take the desirability of your home another step further by making sure that you have fishing rights to offer your buyers. Let people know that buying your home comes with the option to spend their weekends fishing on the side of a beautiful river, and they’ll be biting your hands off for the chance to move in. Estimates suggest that this adds a value of about 15%.
Add a Residential Lift
Finally, if you’ve got a beautiful home to offer a couple looking for a great place to spend their retirement, then there’s one easy way to help them imagine their life in your property. Australian residential lifts show buyers that they’re going to be able to manage and maintain their independence when they get a little older, because they won’t have to worry about using the stairs. What’s more, residential lifts can also appeal to younger buyers too, because they give them a unique and modern selling point to share when the time comes to sell the property in the future. You’d be surprised at how affordable it can be to place a lift in your home these days, and the value that you get out of the investment can be astronomical. Just imagine how much easier it would be to carry laundry upstairs!
Give Your House a Name
This might sound like a strange way to upgrade the value of your home but bear with us. For most people, it might not matter whether they live at “The Oak”, or 35 Oak lane. However, research has shown that 88% of buyers would prefer to pay more for a home with a name. Perhaps it’s just because people feel like they’re getting a property with more personality this way. Just make sure that you have permission to name your house with your local council and choose a title that’s fitting for the property. It doesn’t make sense to call a city-based property “The Orchard” for instance.
Read next: Importance of Saving for Retirement
No More Computer Eyestrain – Get Rid of your Headaches for Good
My eyes feel strained, I have a headache, and my brain just feels tired.
This is what’s known as computer eyestrain, and anyone who frequently uses a computer has probably had it. It’s no fun, and it keeps our work from reaching its full potential. It also keeps us from resting well at night by throwing off our circadian rhythm, especially if using a computer after daylight hours, in a poorly lit room.
This is caused by the blue light computer screens emit which is designed to mimic the sun.
Here are 5 sure fire ways to get rid of those darn computer eye strain headaches for good.
Computer eye strain headaches – get rid of them for good
1. The 20-20-20 rule
Looking at something in the distance will give your eye muscles a break to reduce fatigue and headaches. This trick is intended to exercise your eyes and give them a break from your computer’s bright backlight.
2. Take frequent breaks
I know this might sound counter-productive, but I guarantee if you take more short breaks from your computer screen your eyes will thank you and you will see an immediate improvement in your productivity. Here’s some tips for making it happen:
- Drink more water. Not only will this keep you hydrated, it will also demand frequent trips for refills…and bathroom breaks.
- Set a reminder on your desktop. This goes for the 20-20-20 rule as well.
- Avoid the elevator. If you work 17 floors up, maybe not or you’ll be late for work. However, if you’re on the second or third floor, or you need to run downstairs for something, this extra bit of exercise will improve your circulation and engage your muscles, giving you an extra boost of energy, and a mental boost as well!
3. Increase your font size
When you can, increase your font size. If the text is too small, you’ll squint, which is the number one culprit of eye fatigue and headaches.
4. Try computer eyestrain glasses
Computer reading glasses are specially made to help reduce eyestrain. They have an anti-reflective coating to help reduce glare and a tint that helps increase contrast for easier viewing. For those of us who already wear glasses, prescription computer glasses are also available
5. Give your eyes a break
It can be tempting to binge on netflix as soon as you get home from work, but try giving your eyes a break from all the blue light that’s causing them grief. Staring at a screen all day not only weakens your vision, but it could lead to worse problems, like computer vision syndrome.